Greetings, humans! Your feline ruler has spoken once more. Yes...indeed, it is I. Emma, your goddess. I have commandeered Marie's (my mom) blog today to bring you an important seasonal message...
Well, it's my favorite time of year again. A time when I can freely tear apart wrapping paper (I know they put it there just for me), then sit beneath that glowing tree and view my kingdom from the best vantage point - it's all right, no need to be shy...I know you're worshiping me instead of the silly foliage.
Plus, it's a time when all the cats in the house receive more catnip toys as stocking stuffers because the humans are in a giving mood.
Why anyone would need to stuff their stockings is beyond me. My feet are purrfect!
But, none of you fool me. Sure, I've heard all the propaganda about how the holiday came around, and especially concerning that jolly weirdo in the red suit. Still, you mustn't couch it in acceptable terms for other humans to understand. We get that this is the season of Meow-mas, and yes, it's all about us!
Is it any wonder that cats are the most photogenic species on the planet? Never mind that we just like toying with you so the camera snaps the picture at the wrong time.
So, bring on the kitty worship, if you please.
Hey, I told you I can splell!
So, you'll likely be surprised, but for this one day, I might even be willing to share the greater rewards of this fine holiday with my fellow feline compatriots. Yes, perhaps since Kit and Smokey live here, I can include them too. For it is a cat celebration. Good grief, don't stick a silly hat on my head with a fuzzy ball (though we do like to chase those). I know it's merely a human thing. Seriously, it's cruel and unusual punishment.
What is an elf, anyway?
Simply worship us, dear humans, and I promise that for one day your household will be as pleasant as possible. It's true, we'll refrain from clawing your carpets and furniture (and instead attack presents!), or vomiting on your most prized possessions. After all, it's the season of giving, so give to us.
Oh, and if I haven't said it already...Merry Meow-mas to all!